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Prisoners of The Match
|writer = Doctor Bugs, The Imperial Ghost (original assigned writer, wrote first draft.) |directed = Doctor Bugs |animate = SBCA |title card = (new version)}} Prisoners of The Match is the 4th episode of the series Basket Sponge. It aired on January 4, 2015. It was created by , re-written and modified by Doctor Bugs. Plot To get ready for the upcoming season, the Bikini Bottom Bulldogs have a scrimmage against some guys in the street, but they can't win. Story SpongeBob: (wakes up) I'M REEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA- Squidward: If you say that one more time I swear to Neptune I'll cook your head for Thanksgiving! SpongeBob: ....okay, sorry. Guess what! Do you know what today is? Squidward: Yes, we have that stupid scrimmage in the ghetto. Krabs: (jumps out of Squidward's mailbox) The ghetto???? No!!!!! Me money!!!!! Don't mug me!!!!! You can kill me, just don't take me money!!!!! (runs down the street) SpongeBob: Uhhh....how'd he get there? Squidward: You don't wanna know. (wink) SpongeBob: That's disgusting.....whatever that means. Anyway, I'm gonna go wake up Pat! Don't wanna be late! SpongeBob enters Patrick's home. Patrick is fast asleep in bed. He is holding two basketballs in his arms. Patrick: (sleep talking) Aww yes!!! Basketballs, baby!!! SpongeBob: That's nice. He's dreaming about basketballs. Patrick: (sleep talking) Girl, you have the biggest basketballs of any girl I know... SpongeBob: .........well that was an unexpected comment. Patrick: (squeezing the two balls) Girl, I could play with your basketballs all day. What do you say we score some points? SpongeBob: OKAYYYY!!! Time to wake him up! (starts shaking him) Patrick, wake up! Patrick! Patrick: (in his dream world, we see him on a beach with his dream girl) Patrick is about to kiss his dream girl, when her head suddenly turns into SpongeBob's head. SpongeBob: (in Patrick's dream) Patrick, wake up! Patrick! Patrick: (wakes up) AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! SpongeBob, you had BIG basketballs!!!! SpongeBob: What? .....never mind, come on! We're gonna be late! Patrick: Are we going to Chik-Fil-A? SpongeBob: We're going to the ghetto! Our team has a scrimmage against some ghetto guys today. Patrick: Will there be girls there? SpongeBob: It's the ghetto, Patrick. Patrick: So? SpongeBob: Let's stop talking. Let's go. 15 minutes later LeBron: Good, everybody gathered here today in the ghetto. Krabs: (shaking nervously, holding his pockets) Gulp......I don't like this place... LeBron: So, who's ready for the scrimmage? SpongeBob: Me! Me! Meeeeeeeeeeee!!!! Larry: So, who are these guys we're gonna scrimmage against? LeBron: I have no idea. I met 'em online. They told me to meet them at the Bikini Bottom Prison. Squidward: That would explain why we're standing outside of a prison. LeBron: (looks at his watch) They should be here by now. Plankton: Maybe they meant INSIDE the prison. LeBron: What? inside the prison? BAHAHAH! Don't be ridiculous! .......(walks into the prison) Woman at the Counter: Hi, welcome to Bikini Bottom Prison, how can I help you? Patrick: (punches SpongeBob) Told ya there'd be girls here! SpongeBob: (sigh) LeBron: I have an appointment with some prisoners. We have a basketball scrimmage scheduled for today. Woman at the Counter: Down the hallway, take a left at the water fountain. That's where the basketball court is. LeBron: Okay, thanks. Come on, team, let's go. Patrick: (stays at the counter, drooling and staring at the lady) LeBron: Patrick!! Let's go!! Patrick: Oh, sorry! Coming! (turns to the lady) This isn't gonna work out. I'm just not ready for a relationship. But just for the record....I LOVE YOU! (runs down the hallway) Woman at the Counter: .....(calls the Head Sheriff) Yeah, we're gonna need a taser and some pepper spray. In the hallway LeBron: Now, before we enter the basketball court, we need to discuss our game plan. Squidward: Which is? LeBron: I have absolutely no idea. Krabs: What?? Nothing?? You mean I came here to potentially get mugged....for NOTHING???!!! Larry: Coach!!! We need a plan!! This is our first scrimmage, and more importantly, our first real game is next week! LeBron: Gosh! I said I was sorry! SpongeBob: No you didn't! LeBron: Oh. Well sorry. Plankton: I have a plan!!!!! Larry: What is it? Plankton: Since we have no game plan whatsoever, I say we just throw Pokeballs at them! Squidward: Pokeballs? Are you kidding? Plankton: (pulls out a bag of Pokeballs) LeBron: (sigh) Better than nothing. Now let's get in there and show them what we're made of. The team opened the door, and entered the prison's basketball court. There were 6 tough-looking men on the court. One of them was the coach. Prison Coach: You dirtbags are going down! You know nothing of us, you're a sad excuse of a team! Get ready for some real power! LeBron: Let the game begin! Plankton, you sit on the bench. Plankton: What?? Why??? LeBron: Only five players are allowed on the court at a time. You're player six, now sit the bench. Plankton: Fine! (hands Larry the bag of Pokeballs) Take these, my friend. You're gonna need 'em. Coach blew the whistle, and the game began! Opposing Player: Y'all are goin' DOWN!!! (gets whacked by a Pokeball) Ouch! What the hell??? Larry: Crap! These things only work in the movies! Plankton: (from the bench) Curses! I knew I shouldn't have bought those "Real Pokeballs" on eBay! CURSE YOU, INTERNET! Larry: Even worse, we don't have a plan now! LeBron: (yells from the bench) Just wing it, Larry! You can do it! Larry: You're right. I can do this. SpongeBob: What should we do? Larry: SpongeBob, go to the left corner. Patrick, go to the right corner. Krabs, stay to the side of me. Squidward, go down the middle. Larry got the basketball, and dribbled down the court. The 5 angry prison players were playing some killer defense! .....literally SpongeBob: Ahhh!!!!!! This guy is strangling me!!!! Patrick: Duh, this dude is pointing a gun-shaped basketball at me... Krabs: THIS GUY IS MUGGING ME!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! ME MONEY!!!!!!!!!! Squidward: I'm completely fine.....(blast).........(falls over dead) Larry: Ah! Now what do I do? LeBron: Shoot the ball, Larry!!! SHOOT THE BALL!!!! It was the moment of truth. In slow-motion, with patriotic music, Larry crouched down and got ready to shoot the ball..... (BLAST!) Larry: (the ball deflates) Okay, who shot the ball literally? We weren't talking about actual shooting! Opposing Player: (puts a gun behind his back) Tee-hee....sorry. LeBron: Well....I guess the game can't go on. Squidward: (wakes up, holding his chest) Ohhhh.....what happened. LeBron: We should probably get him to a hospital. The next day at basketball practice LeBron: Well, team, I understand our scrimmage last night was an absolute fail... Larry: Yeah! Tell me about it! Krabs: (sniff) They took me money! Squidward: (feels a bandage on his chest) I can feel my heart contracting... LeBron: But, I wanna compliment each and every one of you. Despite your circumstances, you all did amazing! Larry: But we're completely unprepared for our first real game! It's next week! LeBron: All we need is a game plan. My fault for not thinking of that sooner. But we all learned a lesson today. Larry: Never trust a prisoners? Krabs: Never visit the ghetto with a full wallet? Squidward: Always wear a bullet proof vest? SpongeBob: Sponges can still be strangled even though they have no necks? Plankton: Never buy Pokeballs from eBay?........BLASTED GOOD DEALS!!! Patrick: Playing basketball isn't how I dreamed it would be? Everyone: (staring at Patrick) ............................ LeBron: Ummmmm, no. I have no idea what the lesson is. Let's just never scrimmage again. Squidward: (heart throbs) Agreed.